Shannon Gonter 12/14/22 Shannon Gonter 12/14/22

How Long Should I Be In Counseling For?

The therapeutic process varies from person to person. Many presenting concerns can be dealt with in a brief period of time, but this is not always the case. Unfortunately, there is no magic formula to determine how long counseling will take.

I can only speak from the lens of my personal life, private practice and how I navigate things with my clients - but know that other providers working from other theories and modalities navigate their sessions and treatment very differently.

So I definitely encourage you to check in with your prospective or current clinician and ask them some questions about this and their view on it. Whether it is during your consultation call before starting services with them or you have been seeing them for months or years. Could be helpful to know what the typical length of treatment is for an average client, etc.

Some providers believe that people should be in therapy forever - and others do not. I personally think that everyone should have access to affordable and accessible mental health care whenever they want it - if they want it. But that is with the understanding that I am a believer in mental health self work all year round. This may sometimes mean counseling is the mental health care we need and other times it is community or support groups or connection with something larger than ourselves, or being in nature, or doing body work, etc.

Specifically talking about counseling though, a lot of the work I do with my clients is getting them to a space to “be their own counselor” and building up the internal relationships within themselves with all sorts of different thoughts, feelings and sensations - so they are able to connect with them and eventually explore on their own similar to how we do in session.

My goal is to ultimately help my clients reach a point where they don’t need counseling anymore. They may still have personal work to do (who doesn’t), but they will have learned the the internal skills they need to act as their “own therapist” over time.

All while knowing their bodies and minds better so they can pick up on the signals it sends that let us know we are in a space of needing help from someone else again and cannot and should not be tackling this all alone. Maybe these signals lead us to start up counseling again - or maybe we do something else that allows us to put our mental wellness front of line.

Whatever it may be - if we are listening to our minds and bodies with a non judgmental, curious and compassionate ear - we are doing what we need to be doing.

Now I hear you out there being like - okay so how long will it take me to learn how to be my own counselor?! 1 month? 4 months? 1 year? 5 years? — HA! Get to the point lady and answer the damn question!

Well. There is no right or wrong path for you and and your relationship with counseling and the length of time you spent in it. It is all about meeting you and your lived experience with counseling with an open mind and exploring it without judgement or expectation to be or not be a certain way. All while knowing that your needs are constantly changing based on whats happening now in your life and what the internal framework for handling those happenings looks like.

Also - keep in mind that counseling is a very subjective experience and outside of the actual length of sessions - not much can be guaranteed or is for certain in what you will experience.

Frustrating - I know.

But the sooner we can notice the parts of us that think therapy “should look like this” or “last for this long” the more equipped we will be to update those and let them know that whatever is happening is where we need to be and what we need to be doing right now.

Okay so giving you a little bit of concrete info for my sessions with clients before dipping back into the length of counseling as a treatment -in regards to session length - the initial intake session will be 50 minutes long, and every session after that will be 50 minutes from start to finish.

Though some find it odd - 50 minutes is a common “therapy hour” and many clinicians will do this - but some will do 60 minute sessions and others offer 90 or 30 minute offerings as well.

Now back to talking about the therapeutic process (how long you go to therapy for) - this is what varies from person to person greatly. Many presenting concerns can be dealt with in a brief period of time, but this is not always the case. Unfortunately, there is no magic formula to determine how long counseling will take.

I have some clients who I see on a weekly basis for 5 months - some I see bi weekly for 8 months and others that I see on a weekly or bi weekly basis for years.

Usually my clients start out with weekly sessions and then if they choose to change to bi weekly sessions or another level of frequency they can of course do that. The reason for starting out with weekly sessions and why this is most common in the world of therapy is for consistency and comfortability. We usually get to a point in counseling of sharing things with our therapists that we have never shared with anyone else before - and in order to do that we have to build trust, a relationship and feel comfortable in the room. A lot of the times what helps us do this is consistency and increased exposure to the normalization of having a safe and secure space to share our inner thoughts and feelings in a non judgmental environment.

If we only go to counseling once a month - totaling about 12 hrs a year - all parts of us may not get the opportunity to feel that safety and not be able to trust the therapeutic relationship and process.

When thinking of this in terms of other wellness activities it sometimes can click better. If we are wanting to get back into a running routine for our physical fitness and only go on a jog once a month - we likely aren’t going to be able to sustain much more distance than we did at the beginning. But if we got on a walk once a week and a jog every other week - we are giving our cardiovascular muscle a better chance at increasing their stamina by working out those muscle on a more frequent and consistent basis.

No right or wrong way to train for that race - but likely the person getting up and moving more frequently will meet their goals quicker. Translated to therapy - the individual committing to self growth and healing by prioritizing it and going consistently - MIGHT be able to accomplish goals in therapy at a different pace than others who only go once a month.

With all that being said - there still is not a great way to estimate how long you will be in therapy for. But reminder that it is always your choice and something that you and your provider should be openly exploring throughout your services. During the therapeutic process, you and your therapist should check in on your progress and this might be able to shine some light on the timeline it took to get from where you were and where you are now. With my clients I try to do this frequently just so we can check in on progress towards goals all while continually evaluating their want and need for counseling still.

I am sure some of you are still reading because you are like “she has got to give us a straight answer here…and tell me if I have been in therapy too long or what I am doing is just right” - but with most things in the therapy world - I wont be doing that nor telling you what to do.

Frustrating (again)- I know - specially for those parts of us that really want to hear “Yeah okay you have anxiety - let’s do a session every week for 3 months and then you’ll be good to go :)”.

But when we are able to openly communicate with ourselves and our provider about our thoughts and feelings and really explore our lived experiences - the answer to how long we should be in counseling - lives inside of us. We will know when it is time to stop or pause services. Allowing counseling to fit into our lives when we want or need it and knowing that if we leave it - we can always come back to it and vice versa.

Written by Shannon Gonter, LPCC owner of Therapy by Shannon, LLC

The information and resources contained on this website are for informational purposes only and are not intended to assess, diagnose, or treat any medical and/or mental health disease or condition. The use of this website does not imply nor establish any type of therapist-client relationship. Furthermore, the information obtained from this site should not be considered a substitute for a thorough medical and/or mental health evaluation by an appropriately credentialed and licensed professional.

Shannon Gonter 8/16/22 Shannon Gonter 8/16/22

Counseling for Young Adults

YOUNG ADULTHOOD - THIS PHASE OF LIFE IS OFTEN EMOTIONALLY COMPLEX. It is filled with feelings of excitement and optimism that come with the newfound independence of adulthood. It is also counterbalanced with feelings of confusion, loneliness, and fear due to the loss of certainty about what the future holds.

Young adults nowadays are among the first generations to grow up in a world driven by digital technology. Not to mention the world wide traumas they have all lived through - 9/11, recession and market crash, huge natural disasters, global pandemic and to cap it all off the job landscape rapidly shifting from its traditional ways to something brand new and largely remotely based.

Young adults today - again are the first generation to have digital technology and social media during their foundational childhood years and this impact on how it shaped them - and continues to shape them is still to be determined. They have been for years and continue to be constantly exposed to vastly differing views on politics and religion from loved ones and strangers online. There is also just an overall greater sense of uncertainty surrounding the future of our society than in years past. And on top of all this, these young adults are faced with an overwhelming number of options, each with its own risks and benefits.

In my opinion, the transition from childhood years to adulthood is not as clear-cut as past generations have been. There is no longer a “prescribed” life plan for you. Well maybe there is - within your family or cultural system - but you have greater chances, access and supports to skew from it compared to past generations. Which is cool - but also terrifying and creates a lot of pressure with the unlimited options that are at your fingertips.

It is now typical for individuals in their 20-30s to ask the questions “Who am I?” and “What do I want my life to look like?” These shifts have reflected significant changes in how one might relate to the world around you and how others in society view you.

You might not take the first job that lands in your lap (and your parents may think this is a dumb decision because it is a secure steady income). You may of started college and dropped out because it’s not really want you wanted to do (and people in your life may be pressuring you to go back and “just get the degree”). You may of graduated with a marketing degree but figured out that you really want to go teach 1st grade (and may feel behind and that you wasted time and money getting that degree). Whatever it may be for your specific situation - it is certain that todays young adults have more options than others - but that does not just lead to abundance - though it can - it can also bring on some other things such as pressure, anxiety, judgement, shame and others. With these shifts a certain amount of anxiety and grief is expected.

HOWEVER…

when you feel overwhelmed or underprepared to face the stress of a transition, more serious symptoms of anxiety and depression may develop and affect your mood, motivation, and decision-making skills. These types of issues can affect your social, emotional, and physical well-being and make it difficult for you to develop or sustain meaningful relationships and to work toward educational and occupational goals. When this happens people often feel alone, scared and like something is wrong with them. But in reality - this is just the natural response to the rub and friction adulthood brings into our lives and is very normal to go through at some point in this transition from childhood to adulthood.

COUNSELING IS HERE TO HELP YOU…

become more aware of your internal responses to these challenges as well as help you recognize and bring awareness to the various patterns that run your life and explore new ways to cope and be with these parts of yourself. This awareness will create new opportunities for learning more adaptive ways of relating to others, yourself and coping with life’s many stressors.

IN COUNSELING WITH SHANNON GONTER…

you can start to feel more capable of dealing with the challenges of adulthood, more connected to self and others, and more empowered to make decisions and follow through on plans that reflect your renewed sense of self and purpose.

Reach out today to learn more about what working with her looks like if you are in the Louisville or Kentucky area.

Now of course all generations have had their things and struggles and all people have gone through this transition but that does not mean that everyone was given the space to explore, normalize and process this transition. I have worked with a lot of 45 year olds who would not call themselves a “young adult” longing for a space to process how difficult this transition was and carrying with them the burdens from these early adult years.

The young adulthood years are foundational for all. Connect with a professional and get assistance in unloading and carrying some of what you may be carrying - no matter your age. You are not alone - and it is never too late.

Written by Shannon Gonter

I specialize in working with individuals aged 18-35. Some presenting concerns that I most commonly work with are stress, relationship issues, difficulty saying “no” to others, difficulties recognizing emotions and emotionally connecting to others, anger, and intimacy issues, among others. I am trained to help you become more aware of your emotional responses to these challenges and help you recognize problematic relational patterns and new ways to cope. This awareness will create new opportunities for learning more adaptive ways of relating to others and coping with life’s stressors.

Shannon Gonter 6/8/22 Shannon Gonter 6/8/22

Therapy and advice giving

A lot of people want their counselor to tell them what to do - but that is not what mental health counseling is all about. Therapists are not here to tell you what to do with your life - but more so here to assist you in finding the answers to your own questions inside.

So often during my free 15 minute consultation calls - that I do with prospective clients - so many individuals say that they want “someone to tell them what to do”, “they want someone to listen to them and give them non-judgmental advice on their life”.

I always make sure to listen and understand what these prospective clients are saying - while at the same time making sure that I am clear and upfront that I do not give my clients direct advice and will not tell them what to do with their lives.

I am not sure because I am not listening in on other therapists consultation calls but I don't think many counselors or therapist do this during the consultation call but I do because I think it's important for prospective clients to understand that therapist and counselors are not here to give advice and tell people what to do with their lives - but are here to support people in understanding their internal world better and creating some clarity so it is easier for them to make the decisions on their own.

Those professionals that don't correct the prospective clients during the call aren't doing anything wrong. I think they are just hoping that that individual comes into session continues in therapy and understands through the process that the therapeutic relationship is not designed around advice giving and that it’s created and maintained around a non-judgmental trained professional assisting the client in finding the answers within themselves.

Quite honestly who am I to give my clients - let alone anyone - advice on their life. I am a human with all sorts of thoughts, feelings and sensations going on in my life and if I were to give advice to a client - it would be coming from some part of me and not the spot inside of me that is genuinely curious about my clients experience and wants to understand what it is like for them to be them.

Now that doesn’t mean if I did give my clients “advice” it would cause harm to them or be coming from some “bad” space inside of me. Likely it would be coming from a super loving and caregiving side of me that wants the best for my client. But the issue with this is I can only give advice from my lens and my lens is not the same as my clients and therefore throwing my lens onto them could not be what they need. Nor will it help them in the future when I am not there to “tell them what to do”.

I spend an hour with my clients every week or every other week for a couple months or years. Either way I do not know them as well as they know themselves - therefore leaving them the best people to make decisions for their day or day lives.

With that being said - I and other counselors who work from this framework are not just passively sitting in the room and listening to our clients talk.

What I see to be a better fit for long term success for all is for me to focus on me and my parts and for the client to focus on themselves. What this looks like is me being very aware of all parts of me (thoughts, feelings and sensations I am having in response to what my client is sharing with me) and who is online in my head (caretaker, educator, professional, etc). Again this is a very important part of the process because if I am not focused and aware of “who is online in my head” my caretaker or my educator could be leading the entire session and this is not always the best for clients. To ensure that I am remaining as curious, open and compassionate towards my client as possible I am constantly bringing awareness to my internal experience allowing this open and non-judgmental energy to swirl around the room and allow for the client to experiment with.

On the clients end - for them to focus on them looks like the following. Sharing whats on their mind and noticing the different thoughts, feelings and sensations that come up in response to what they just shared, want to share or are afraid to share. Sometimes these can be shared and other times its fine to just notice them internally. But knowing that there is nothing that is off the table to bring into sessions with your provider.

EX) wanting to come in and talk about something but fearing that the therapist will judge them for having certain thoughts or going through certain experiences so they don’t share it at all. Instead of holding all of that awareness alone and to yourself - maybe try sharing with your provider that there is something on your mind that you want to explore but are scared that there might be judgment (not needing to share the thing but just that there is a space inside of you that is very worried about being judged about sharing this thing). Your provider will be able to meet you where you are at and work with that fearful part and provide some reassurance to it, hear its past experiences as to why it fears judgment and connect with it in a way that it might not of ever been connected with before.

Bringing everything back to the idea that therapists are not here to give advice. But are here to meet clients where they are at and that there are no expectations for what is and is not shared in session. Because again if I was over here giving advice to my clients I would not be doing that from a space that is trying to meet them where they are at with genuine curiosity - I would be meeting them with my problem solver, fixer, caretaker etc. part and that is not always what the client need. Typically clients need to be connected with, heard, understood and just provided a space to be.

Again - that cannot happen if I am over here giving advice. Remember that we all have those parts inside of us that just want someone to tell us what to do and would be really good rule followers if someone stepped in and told us what to do - but that is just not how therapy works. So when your provider sets this boundary - it can definitely frustrate certain parts of us that really just want someone to tell them what to do. What can be helpful is to get to know this part a bit more and hear about what it really wants for you by someone telling it what to do. Does it want relief? A break? Just slow down and get curious with it to see.

Written by Shannon Gonter, LPCC in Louisville, KY. Providing telehealth to those in KY and office based and walk and talk sessions to those located around the Louisville area.

Shannon Gonter 5/18/22 Shannon Gonter 5/18/22

Intro to Internal Family Systems

Summary:

Internal Family Systems is a worldwide movement and evidenced based model of non-pathologizing psychotherapy based on the understanding that the mind is naturally multiple and that we aren’t just one personality. We all have a core Self designed to bring harmony and healing to the system as well as parts each tasked with specific roles to keep the system running as smooth as possible.

Throughout life our systems get wounded though and receive all sorts of mixed messages and this causes burdens within us - which creates a variety of protective patterns and behaviors to keep life moving along. These burdens block our Self and the light it naturally has to be seen and felt by us and others. This blockage causes suffering inside us and in the world and left unattended to it can lead to a lot of friction and shame.

This is where the core belief of IFS comes in that there is no such thing as a bad part and if we are able to meet each part of ourselves with compassion and curiosity with goals to build a relationship with it and learn more about it - we can release the burdens and allow our true Self to emerge and shine true more and more.

Goal:

Help people bring awareness, listen to, understand and heal their internal parts, wounds and patterns and help the world become a more compassionate place overall.

What are parts?

At the core - parts are thoughts, feelings, voices, images, sensations, words, sounds, vibes, emotions, etc. that stay blended with us to manage our lives and show up in our day to day life in or around our bodies and minds.

For example, when your friend is late to meet you for lunch you may have several things going on inside you while sitting at the table alone waiting for him.

Should I text him and see where he is? Oh my god I cannot believe he is late again. Am I at the right restaurant? Did I tell him the right time? Uh I hate sitting at the table alone - pretty sure everyone is looking at me. My stomach is hurting - maybe I should get up and go to the bathroom.

Some of these thoughts coming from the same root part and others coming from another. Only way to know what thoughts and sensations belong to what part is to slow down and explore them by extending curiosity to them and seeing if they can separate a little from you so you are able to speak for the parts and not from the parts.
EX) I am so nervous I told my friend the wrong time VS A part of me is so nervous that I told my friend the wrong time to meet for lunch

The latter statement is speaking for your parts and allows for other parts to be present and come online - like maybe the part that knows you told your friend the right time and maybe even brings you to check your texts to verify, etc.

By staying blended with the part and saying “I am so nervous…” and not just a part of me is nervous - you leave no room for anything else to come online therefore staying nervous and becoming stuck there and “spiraling”.

What is Self?

The natural internal leader that wants to build a relationship with all parts (thoughts, feelings, sensations, etc.) in the internal system. It is not better than or superior to parts but is different because it naturally has some qualities that are just there when we are born and can never be damaged or replaced. Those are calm confidence, curiosity, clarity, courage, creativity, consistency, connected knowing and compassion (commonly referred to as the 8 C’s).

Who is IFS for?

Everyone on this planet who wants to experience a different way of looking at who they are and why they are the way they are. Appropriate for all ages.

What type of professionals use this theory to view their clients from?

It was designed and researched by the psychological field for licensed mental health counselors to use with their clients in talk therapy but over the years it has been adopted by other human helping fields such as coaches, physicians, dietitians, etc. In more recent years, the IFS model and viewpoint has been adapted to more macro systems such as schools and governments to understand and bring more compassion and healing to those spaces as well.

Books, podcasts and resources to learn more about IFS:

IFS Guide Community for Self Healers: https://www.ifsguide.com/community.html

Transcending Trauma book: https://www.amazon.com/Transcending-Trauma-Healing-Complex-Internal/dp/1683733975

Various podcasts and teleconferences exploring various IFS related concepts and topics: https://ifs-institute.com/resources/podcasts-and-teleconferences

The One Inside Podcast: https://theoneinside.libsyn.com/

Introduction to IFS book: https://ifs-institute.com/store/39

How to find an IFS mental health therapist:

You can simply use the search filter of “Internal Family Systems” on any mental health therapist directory to find a therapist that has been trained to use this approach.
- Take note that not every professional who lists IFS as a modality they used has been formally trained it in by the institute - so if this is important to you, then be sure to inquire about this during your consultation call.
You can go to the IFS institute website and use your state search filters to find a provider in your area that has completed a Level 1, 2 or 3 training.

If you are very interested in IFS and wanting to see someone who is trained in this modality it is very important to ask that provider what trainings and experience they have with the model. Some professionals have taken a 3 hour webinar on IFS and write on their website or profile that they “do IFS” while others have completed one or multiple of the formal certification programs (6 months + of intensive learning) put on by the IFS institute (these individuals will have something along the lines of “level 1 trained”, “level 2 certified” etc. on their websites.

Why IFS?

I personally love IFS so much because it is one of the only non pathologizing mental health therapies I had experienced and been formally trained in. It meets you where you are at and does not try to change you. A lot of people come into therapy wanting to “stop crying at work everyday” or “stop being so anxious” or “manage their anger better” but IFS doesn’t exactly do that and specially not in the ways other talk therapies do.

And not that you may not get results like being able to get through work without crying all day but IFS is not going to get you there by telling you to do X and more of Y and less of Z. It may get you there by creating space for the tears, leaning into and learning from them about what is going on at work that leads to the tears and how they feel about them not being welcome in the workplace and if this feeling has been mimicked before in their lives and what they feel like might happen if they cannot stop crying at work, etc.

Aiming at getting to a space where we are building a relationship with all the parts of self to better build out our internal maps so when we get dropped in the land of “crying at work” - we know where we are, whats going on, how to separate from it, and how to help it without the massive amounts of judgement and shame that might of been their previously.

It is a bit of an experiment for the system to try something different then the traditional problem solving, compartmentalization ways it is used to doing - but it is SO worth it! Only when we know our entire internal map can be navigate the external world with more ease and confidence.

This does not happen over night and is very much a process but IFS provides a great, adaptable, non shaming framework for this.

Sources for blog: http://www.athousandpaths.com/about-ifs / https://ifs-institute.com/ / https://www.ifsguide.com/ / https://www.choosingtherapy.com/internal-family-systems-therapy

Written by Shannon Gonter

Shannon Gonter 12/2/20 Shannon Gonter 12/2/20

Walk and Talk Counseling

Walk-and-talk is a form of psychotherapy or consultation while walking outdoors in public places. I offer walk-and-talk sessions as an optional treatment modality.

This is a unique approach that combines the benefits of traditional talk therapy with mild walking exercise.

Why do it?

Walk and talk sessions are a great way to switch up the therapy experience and allow for the benefits provided through connecting with nature, getting gentle exercise, and loosening up the thought process through movement.

Who is it best for?

All sorts of people from all walks of life and ages with low to medium emotional distress can participate in walk and talk counseling. Maybe you want to take advantage of this type of therapy because you to switch up the therapy experience and allow for the benefits provided through connecting with nature, getting gentle exercise, and loosening up the thought process through movement.

If you’re interested, we’ll decide beforehand if it’s clinically appropriate for your situation. Walk-and-talk sessions can be used intermittently or regularly, and may be discontinued at any time.

It is not advised that individuals with active psychosis, suicidal thoughts or are in an immediate crisis use this modality. If you are experiencing any of these symptoms it will be better suited for you to see an in person office based counselor to ensure your safety and provide you with the support needed. Please call 911 or find your local mental health emergency services by Googling “(your town) crisis hotline” if you are feeling suicidal or experiencing a mental health crisis.

Concerns to think about before doing a walk and talk session?

Below are the limits of confidentially, risks and more that my clients understand and sign off to when working with me for walk and talk sessions.

I voluntarily elect to participate in walk and talk therapy sessions with Therapy by Shannon, LLC and in doing so I expressly accept and assume ALL of the risks existing in walk and talk therapy and its individual activities and processes (physical, emotional, confidentiality, etc.)

I am medically able to participate in walking therapy and agree to alert my provider to any health concerns that may limit my ability to participate. I am responsible for having any medications on me that are necessary for environmental allergies (e.g., EpiPen for bee stings, inhaler for asthma, etc).

I agree to seek a doctor’s approval before beginning walk/talk therapy if appropriate.
If I have any medical conditions that would be detrimental to walk talk therapy I agree to disclose this and understand my therapist may not be able to offer this as an option.
I agree to inform my provider if our walking pace or any of the conditions associated with walk and talk therapy are uncomfortable for me in any way and I understand that it is my responsibility to communicate this with my therapist.
I understand that there are limits to confidentiality when we are in a public place. I am aware of these limitations and I am comfortable participating regardless.
I understand that if my therapist and I come into contact with a person that I know, I have the right to disclose or not to disclose that I am in a therapy session. I understand that my therapist will follow my lead should we come into contact with a person I know and my therapist will make every effort to preserve client confidentiality and privacy while conducting my walk/talk therapy session.
I understand that if my therapist should come into contact with a person he/she knows, my therapist will not acknowledge me as a client or the walk/talk therapy session as counseling to preserve confidentiality.
I acknowledge unanticipated risks that could result in physical or emotional injury or damage to myself or others and that these risks can not be eliminated. I understand that Therapy by Shannon, LLC is not liable for these risks. These risks include but are not limited to: emotional stress or trauma; strenuous and vigorous physical, mental emotional and intellectual activity; the possibility of slips and falls; bruises, sprains, lacerations, fractures, animal bites or stings, concussions or any physical injury.
I understand that my relationship with my provider is that of client and therapist and is completely professional. I take full responsibility for communicating and maintaining my personal boundaries. I recognize that my therapist will be acting solely as my mental health therapist. I understand that my therapist is not a medical doctor, not a personal fitness trainer, not a physical therapist, not a nurse, and not a nutritionist, etc.
I understand that if I am using in network or out of network insurance benefits, not all insurance plans cover walk and talk sessions or that these sessions might be subject to restrictions in order to qualify for insurance-based coverage. Please check with your provider on more information. Insurance benefits or restrictions to walk and talk sessions will be discussed ahead of time.

Where do sessions take place?

If scheduling sessions with me, you and I will decide together where the best location is for your sessions to take place at. Usually they are at a local public park, neighborhood, or walking trail that provides ample space to ensure the most confidential of conversations possible.

Can I do some sessions walk and talk and some online?

With my clients - I do allow them to do hybrid services. Maybe they want to mix it up and do some online, some in the office and some outside / or other times weather makes those decisions for us and it is raining during the time of our walk and talk session so we move it online for the day.

I recommend exploring this with your therapist and listening to your body the week of session to explore what it needs in that moment. Maybe we scheduled our walk and talk therapy session weeks ago and now that it’s week of session you aren’t feeling it- you as the client has full autonomy to alter the delivery method of your session (as long as it it inside the rescheduling window) to honor what your body needs in the moment.

What if I don’t like it?

Remember that therapy is a service and service driven by you. If you don’t like it - don’t do it. Before stopping, I do suggest getting curious about why you do not like it and bring that into conversation with your therapist if you feel comfortable. By doing this you both will be able to explore what is going on, options for your future services and how you would like to proceed going forward. Sometimes walk and talk sessions just might not be for you - but there also are times that walk and talk sessions allow us to access parts of self that are often hidden from us. This then makes us feel uncomfortable, vulnerable and scared - maybe bringing up an avoidance, blockage, or something else that is happening behind the scenes.

Written by: Shannon Gonter, LPCC in Louisville, KY in practice with Therapy by Shannon, LLC

Shannon Gonter 11/18/20 Shannon Gonter 11/18/20

Online Counseling FAQ

Being online is nothing out of the ordinary for us - but doing therapy online is. Since COVID-19 almost 100% of medical and mental health services quickly transitioned to providing services via secure online video/audio platforms and now it is here to stay. So let’s answer some common questions asked and clear up some of the misinformation out there about online mental health counseling.

What is tele-mental health?

Also referred to as Telemedicine, Tele-Mental Health, E-Health, and E-Counseling. The definition for telemedicine or telehealth is the use of electronic communication and information technologies to provide or support clinical care at a distance. Using the telephone, text, e-mail, or interactive tele-video-conferencing technologies.

What are the benefits of using technology with my therapist?

· Crisis intervention or other contacts between in-person sessions.

· Conducting sessions with clients who are not able to attend in-person sessions for a period of time.

· Conducting psychotherapy with an individual in a different geographical area with or without in-person face-to-face contact.

· Providing assessment, prevention or treatment of mental health presenting concerns or related services to an individual in a different location.

· Conducting psychotherapy via phone or Internet synchronistically (i.e., at the same time, such as on the phone or via video-conferencing) or a-synchronistically (i.e., sequential, via text, e-mail or chat).

How do I know online services are right for me?

Talk to your therapist and see! Whether you are in relationship with a provider now, or if it is during a free consultation call - inquire about their offerings with online services and ask about appropriateness of fit. In regard to how I navigate this with my clients - if at any time while we are engaging in tele-therapy, I determine, in my sole discretion, that tele-therapy is no longer the most appropriate form of treatment for you, we will discuss options of engaging in face-to-face in-person counseling or possible referrals to another professional in your location who can provide appropriate services.

What are the benefits of doing online sessions?

There are risks and benefits to using online platforms for therapy. One of the benefits of tele-therapy is that the client and therapist can engage in services without being in the same physical location. This can be helpful in ensuring continuity of care if the client or therapist moves to a different location, takes an extended vacation, or is otherwise unable to continue to meet in person. It can also increase the convenience and time efficiency of both parties. Important to note that for most mental health services the client must be in the state that the clinician is licensed in. For example, all clients of mine must be in the state of KY during time of service because my practicing license is only for the state of KY.

What are the risks of doing online sessions?

Although there are benefits of tele-therapy, there are some fundamental differences between in- person psychotherapy and tele-therapy, as well as some inherent risks. For example:

· Risks to confidentiality. Because tele-therapy sessions take place outside of the typical office setting, there is potential for third parties to overhear sessions if they are not conducted in a secure environment. I will take reasonable steps to ensure the privacy and security of your information, and it is important for you to review your own security measures and ensure that they are adequate to protect information on your end. You should participate in therapy only while in a room or area where other people are not present and cannot overhear the conversation.

· Issues related to technology. There are risks inherent in the use of technology for therapy that are important to understand, such as: potential for technology to fail during a session, potential that transmission of confidential information could be interrupted by unauthorized parties, or potential for electronically stored information to be accessed by unauthorized parties.

· Crisis management and intervention. As a general rule I will not engage in tele-therapy with patients who are in a crisis situation. Before engaging in tele-therapy, we will develop an emergency response plan to address potential crisis situations that may arise during the course of our tele-therapy work.

Written by: Shannon Gonter, LPCC in Louisville, KY in practice with Therapy by Shannon, LLC

Shannon Gonter 9/23/20 Shannon Gonter 9/23/20

Find A Therapist And Mental Health Stigma

When thinking about entering into a relationship with a counselor/therapist or not, one of your evaluating factors HAS TO BE the societal stigma of “being in therapy”. Say what?! Huh. I don’t say this to heighten or increase the stigma but because this is a HUGE barrier that keeps people from asking for help from a trained mental health professional.

When thinking about entering into a relationship with a counselor/therapist or not, one of your evaluating factors HAS TO BE the societal stigma of - being in therapy - going to see a counselor - asking for help from someone outside of the family - asking for help at all.

Say what?! Huh.

I don’t say this because I want to heighten or increase the stigma but because this is a HUGE barrier that keeps people from asking for help from a trained mental health professional in the first place.

Without having the explicit or implicit stigma in our conscious awareness, how are we ever going to take control of it? ( hint hint - we won’t)

When stigma is not controlled it can consume us (and definitely when we don’t even recognize or know its there).

When it consumes us it keeps us STUCK.

When we feel stuck, we can sometimes feel HELPLESS & HOPELESS.

When we feel like this we often feel like there is NO OTHER OPTION than where we are now.

But I am here to show you, that there is!

No secret that there is a stigma of personal mental health services and the industry as a whole. So once we can be aware and welcome the stigma associated with asking for help from a therapist (as one of the multiple factors in the equation) we can take ownership of it and ask that part of us that is feeling the stigma what’s up and learn more about why is feels that way. What does it need to tell us? What is it afraid of? Let’s get curious about why it’s there.

Example: John works out on a regular basis and eats healthy. He has done these things for years and usually it assists him after a stressful day but the past year it just doesn’t seem to be cutting it anymore. He has been told by his friends and family for years that therapy would really help him. They let him know that it will really assist him relieve some of the work stress he is experiencing and be more present when at home. He knows his brother has seen a therapist in the past and he knows that it assisted him greatly.

So he started following lots of mental health and wellness professionals on social media and gets some benefit and relief from filling his feed with positively and helpful, educational mental health and wellness facts. This allows him to manage for a little bit longer and but he soon looses interest in social media.

He finally says that he will go see a counselor because he knows that him following lots of health and wellness individuals on social media, working out regularly, and eating healthy just isn’t doing it for him anymore. He starts by just googling “how to find a counselor in Louisville, KY”. He is directed to a mental health directory site and starts using the search filters to find someone that fits his financial, location and personal needs.

These prompted search filters allow him to think about some of the items in the equation to seeing a counselor. Takes into account his financials, and his budget for services and if he is going to use his insurance. Thinks about what type of services he would like talk therapy, testing, or medication management. Factors in if he wants to see someone in person or online or maybe even a combination of the two. Possibly the demographics of the individual he wants to talk with and if he feels most comfortable with a male, female, POC, etc. Maybe he even factors in some personal recommendations and he goes back to those friends and family members and he asks them if they have seen a professional before and if they could recommend anyone. And maybe he even checks in with his medical professional at their next check up…

He does such a thorough and amazing job at filtering and researching the variety of therapists in his area and he has it narrowed down to this one therapist that he feels gets him. Their professional website and social media presence speaks to him and he just feels like he has already got so much benefit from reading their blogs. He gets excited about his future and the ways his life could look differently if he could get into an appointment with this professional.

He types up an inquiry email to send and doesn’t send it. He thinks about calling but never does. He continues to add it to his to do list but it never gets done.

This cycle continues for the next 6 months all while he continues to beat himself up around the fact that he “can never do anything right” or “follow through with anything” and that he is “doomed” and just feels “so stuck”.

PAUSE. Familiar with this scenario at all?

I am! This is all so common in the mental health field. I believe it is because stigma was never one of the conscious factors thought out. It was very much an unconscious thing doing its job behind the scenes, keeping John stuck.

We grow up with films, tv and possibly our friends and family painting a picture of what the mental health industry looks like. Unfortunately, they get it all wrong. They tell us what “crazy” looks like, how the mental health world is only at psychiatric hospitals, framing that “only alcoholics see therapists”, telling us that we shouldn’t share our home life with “strangers”, and so forth. Most of us were never really set up for success with the appropriate education, support and foundation to be able to navigate the mental health world in a healthy way to begin with.

So, let’s go back to the beginning and normalize mental health! Allow the stigma that is ingrained in all of us and our society to be one of the factors and challenge it head on! How do we do this? How can John allow this into the picture so it doesn’t keep him stuck behind the scenes?

Ways to do this:

Challenge:

We don’t think any differently of those who get their hair cut by a hair stylist, or who hire personal trainer so why think any differently of those who hire people to work on their inner workings?!

Normalize:

We are all humans and all humans have a mental health to maintain and look after. And remember, very few of us were given the appropriate tools, spaces or resources to know what to do with all these feels. AND even those of us who have masters and doctorate level degrees in mental health are not immune from it! #TheFeelsGetUsAll

Choice:

This is your past, present and future. Take ownership of it. Just because people ahead of us or next to us say certain things and do certain things, doesn’t mean we have to subscribe to those as well. We can do something else in the present moment so our futures look differently.

Talk:

To a friend, a family member, virtual partners, co-workers, or to your journal. Remember though that a friend or family member is not professionally trained to help you grow, heal, and change. It’s likely that your friends and family will give you their best advice, but you may need another set of eyes and ears on the matter and that is where a trained, licensed mental health professional can come in. Whereas a friend might give advice based on their personal relationship with you or based on their own life experience, I am interested in helping you find your own answers by helping you to connect with what is true and right for you. I am committed to maintaining an unbiased and judgement-free position in the room.

The only way to do something about anything is to bring awareness to it, name it, create space for it, be curious about what to do with it and then see how it evolves in this newfound space of awareness and action. #CreateSpace #AllowCompassion

Written by Shannon Gonter

I specialize in working young adults. I am passionate about my career and want to work with you to create positive change. I also strive to create a counseling environment where men and young adults can relate, feel heard, and find new solutions to their negative patterns. Some issues that I most commonly work with are stress, relationship issues, difficulty saying “no” to others, difficulties recognizing emotions and emotionally connecting to others, anger, and intimacy issues, among others.

*The information and resources contained on this website are for informational purposes only and are not intended to assess, diagnose, or treat any medical and/or mental health disease or condition. The use of this website does not imply nor establish any type of therapist-client relationship. Furthermore, the information obtained from this site should not be considered a substitute for a thorough medical and/or mental health evaluation by an appropriately credentialed and licensed professional.

Shannon Gonter 9/9/20 Shannon Gonter 9/9/20

Mental Health Stigma

People don’t think twice about hiring an interior designer if they don’t have experience decorating houses, or hiring a wedding planner to coordinate their wedding weekend, or have pause about paying a plumber to come in and do some work.

For real, if a friend was complaining to you about keeping up their yard, the conversation wouldn’t get too deep before you suggested to hire a lawn care company to help them out. Or if your friend cut their own hair and it didn’t turn out looking too hot, you may suggest making an appointment with a trained hair stylist the next time they need a hair cut.

For the most part we can all agree that there is nothing wrong with seeking out additional support from a trained professional when needed and that we often are in search of others that we can rely on.

But sadly, when it comes to our internal states and our emotions, the story changes dramatically.

With counseling and mental health, the picture that is painted of someone who seeks professional assistance from a trained mental health professional is that they are weak, damaged, not strong enough to handle it on their own, broken, have a lot of things wrong with them and on and on.

I call BS on that.

Individuals who enter therapy are strong, capable people who want to understand themselves and the world around them a little bit better and grow with the every changing demands our world places on us.

The idea that entering counseling is something “weak” people do is shifting more and more as the years pass (thank goodness) but unfortunately the stigma is still there. Mental Health Louisville is an initiative in Louisville, KY aiming to rid the city of the mental health stigma. I hope more of the same mission driven agencies pop up around the nation because this is not just an issue in KY, it’s everywhere.

I am Shannon Gonter and I specialize in working with men and young adults. I am passionate about my career and want to work with you to create positive change. I also strive to create a counseling environment where men and young adults can relate, feel heard, and find new solutions to their negative patterns. Some issues that I most commonly work with are stress, relationship issues, difficulty saying “no” to others, difficulties recognizing emotions and emotionally connecting to others, anger, and intimacy issues, among others.

Shannon Gonter 5/20/20 Shannon Gonter 5/20/20

Process To Counseling With Shannon Gonter, LPCC

Shannon Gonter is a licensed professional clinical counselor in Louisville, KY providing individual mental health counseling in her office off Goldsmith Ln. and online.

How will I know you are the right counselor for me?

Take a look around my site, and trust your gut feelings!

In order to give you a better idea, let’s chat! Feel free to contact me for a free 15-minute phone consultation to see if I would be the best counselor to assist you in reaching your goals.

If you're considering therapy and wondering how to begin, I’m here to guide you through the process. First, take some time to explore my website, blogs, and social media (Instagram & Facebook—though I’m not very active on these platforms) to see if what I share resonates with you. It’s important to find a therapist whose approach aligns with your needs and values.

If you find things that ring true for you, the next step is to reach out. You can complete an inquiry form on my website or contact me via email or phone (text preferred) to schedule your free phone consultation.

What to Expect During the Free Consultation Call

During this consultation, we’ll review important logistical details about my practice, such as location, fees, and session availability, to ensure everything works for you. I’ll also use this time to learn a little more about you and why you’re seeking therapy. You’re welcome to ask me any questions about counseling, my therapeutic style, or anything else on your mind.

After the Phone Consultation…

If we both feel that scheduling an initial appointment is the right next step, I’ll set you up with an intake appointment date and time. I’ll also send you the necessary paperwork to complete electronically before your first session.

If, for any reason, we decide that an intake appointment might not be the best next step, I’m happy to provide you with recommendations for other clinicians who may be a better fit for your needs.

Feel free to contact me if you have any further questions about this process or if you want to learn more about my services. I’m here to help you take the next steps toward your mental wellness journey.

Meet Shannon Gonter, professional counselor in Louisville, KY

FEMALE. PARTNER. ENTREPRENEUR. MENTAL HEALTH ADVOCATE. DAUGHTER. FLORIDIAN. CEREAL ENTHUSIAST. FRIEND. TYPE A. SISTER. PODCAST LOVER. LOUISVILLE TRANSPLANT. AUNT. CONNECTOR. NETFLIX SUPPORTER. ORGANIZER. THRILL SEEKER.

Written by Shannon Gonter

I specialize in working with men and young adults. I am passionate about my career and want to work with you to create positive change. I also strive to create a counseling environment where men and young adults can relate, feel heard, and find new solutions to their negative patterns. Some issues that I most commonly work with are stress, relationship issues, difficulty saying “no” to others, difficulties recognizing emotions and emotionally connecting to others, anger, and intimacy issues, among others.

Shannon Gonter 5/6/20 Shannon Gonter 5/6/20

What Are The Benefits and Risks of Counseling?

Counseling is a collaborative process which involves the development of a confidential, unique, therapeutic, helping relationship. This relationship is unlike any other as I, and other mental health therapists, will act as a facilitator in helping you better understand yourself, the world around you, your feelings, and your behaviors.

Along with these benefits, counseling will also involve discussing the unpleasant parts of your life, and you may experience uncomfortable feelings during these moments, and after sessions. But remember that using the awareness of one’s pain can aid the healing process and result in better relationships with yourself and others.

Please understand that there are no guarantees of what you will experience while in counseling as each individual and their experiences are so unique. Sometimes personal growth can be quick and easy and other times it may be slow and difficult. Good thing is that the majority of individuals who attend counseling find immense physical and emotional relief and are able to live a happier and healthier lives.

Written by: Shannon Gonter, LPCC

Shannon Gonter, Professional Counseling in Louisville, KY

Shannon Gonter 3/11/20 Shannon Gonter 3/11/20

Will My Counselor Really Keep My Information Confidential?

The law protects the privacy of all communications between a client and a counselor. In most situations, I can only release information about our professional relationship if you sign a written authorization form.

How do you really know that the information, stories and hardships shared with a mental health counselor will not be shared with others?

The law protects the privacy of ALL communications between a client and a counselor. It is important to note that the “all” really means all here. Communication in face to face sessions, tele-health sessions, texts, phone calls, emails, faxes, in person communication outside of session, literally all communications from once you become a client to forever - all kept confidential. And yes I do mean forever. Most licensing boards and confidentially laws extend past the death of a client. Therefore meaning if Bob Bobberson was my client from 2016-2018, I will still keep his information (and the fact that he was a client of mine) for my ears and eyes only and in 50 years it will still be the same, and when he passes away, still the same.

Though Louisville is not a small town, it by no means is a large city. Therefore, there is the potential for you to cross paths with your counselor outside of the therapy hour. Your counselor will likely discuss their policy surrounding this during your intake appointment, but if they don’t - then ask them about it to plan for future happenings. If you do run into each other outside of the therapy hour in the community, your therapist will most likely will not make it known that they know you (because even outside of session it is our duty to protect you). Suggestion to have this discussion with your counselor to see how they would handle situations such as this outside of session and plan accordingly.

Personally, if I see my clients at Kroger, Cherokee Park, a bar, the movies, etc. I act as if we have never met. This is not because I don’t want to smile at them or say hi to them, it is to protect my clients and their rights as a client of mine. I also want to ensure that they are not put in a situation of having to explain to a family member, friend or bystander how they know me. If my client makes the decision to interact with me in the community, that is their personal choice and I will follow their lead.

Limits to Confidentiality

In most situations, a counselor can only release information about your professional relationship if you sign a written authorization form (ROI).

But there are some situations in which counselors are legally obligated to take actions that they believe may be necessary to protect the client or others from harm. If such a situation arises, the counselor will limit disclosure to what is necessary in the given situation.

If the professional has reason to believe that a child or vulnerable adult is being neglected or abused, the law requires that the situation be reported to the appropriate state agency. If the counselor believes a client presents clear and substantial danger of harm to themselves or another/others, they are ethically obligated to take protective actions.

These actions may include contacting family members, seeking a higher level of care, notifying any potential victim(s), and notifying the police.

While this summary is designed to provide an overview of confidentiality and its limits, your counselor will review this with you during your first session and should also be written within the paperwork signed prior to your first session. Don’t hesitate to ask your therapist any questions about the laws of confidentiality. This is a very unique thing between your relationship with a counselor and someone else and needs to be clearly understood by all.

Shannon Gonter 12/18/19 Shannon Gonter 12/18/19

Therapy Questions Answered

Interview with Brittany Johnson a licensed professional counseling in New Albany, Indiana and Shannon Gonter a licensed professional clinical counselor in Louisville, KY. Discuss the ins and outs of what counseling is, how to find a counselor, different ways of paying for counseling, and what to do if you feel like you and your counselor aren’t a good fit.

Transcript-

Shannon Gonter:
Hey everyone. I'm Shannon Gonter, a licensed professional counselor, practicing in private practice in Louisville, Kentucky and today I'm here to interview Brittany Johnson. If you want to go ahead and introduce yourself.

Brittany Johnson:
Hi everybody, my name is Brittany A. Johnson. I am a licensed mental health counselor in New Albany, Indiana. That's where my private practice is. I am also the author of a book titled, Get Out of Your Own Way, and I am glad to be here with you, Shannon today.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah, well we're just going to answer some questions that I know are always floating around about mental health counseling and just kind of break down some of the basics and barriers for people who are thinking about counseling or want to just know more about it. So, let's just start out with what is therapy?

Brittany Johnson:
All right. So to me, therapy is going to see someone or seeing someone on your computer or over the phone, and it's a professional who has went through training and education. And they are going to give you a non-biased, nonjudgmental listening ear. Going to therapy, also, in my opinion, is someone who is trained to help you sort through anything that's cluttered in your mind, anything going on in your life; past, present, future.
And so to me, that's what therapy is just going to see someone that is going to give you an objective view of what you're saying and what you're doing and help you reach goals that you've established or help you clear out things that have got you stuck or you've experienced in your past.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah, definitely. And you talked a little bit about the education. There's lots of different letters that come after all of our names. For example, I'm a licensed professional clinical counselor, so that's LPCC in the state of Kentucky. And then what license are you?

Brittany Johnson:
My license in Indiana is a licensed mental health counselor, which is the equivalent of an LPCC in Kentucky, or an LPC in Illinois, or LPC in Ohio.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah, yeah. What are some other letters that people might see behind people's names that would be licensed therapists?

Brittany Johnson:
Yeah. Typically, the most common one that you typically see, is a licensed clinical social worker or LCSW. And then an LMFT, which is a licensed marriage and family therapist, as well. So those are the common ones that you see for masters level. Now when you start talking about doctorate level therapists, you'll see a [inaudible 00:02:40] which are licensed clinical psychologist. And then PhD is also one that I've started to see a little bit lately, which are traditional PhD degrees in counseling, or whatnot. I forgot about the drug and alcohol certificate. There's also, I think it's, LACD or LDC. Sorry, [inaudible 00:03:02] a little bit. It's different in each state, but it's the licensed drug and alcohol counselors.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah, definitely. And then, the MDs are nurse practitioners of psychiatrists or practitioners who are going to be the ones prescribing medications. Definitely a difference between individuals who prescribe the medications and people who do talk therapy. And then, so if I'm a client looking to do therapy with someone, are there different like modalities or theories that different therapists work from? And what may work best with my personality or maybe my presenting an issue that I'm struggling with?

Brittany Johnson:
Yes, definitely. One of the things I don't think I mentioned in my introduction, but I am certified in EMDR, which is the eye movement desensitization reprocessing therapy. So with EMDR, that modality, we believe that you work from a negative belief system, and that your negative belief system has overtaken the positive belief system, and it has caused you to have things that you've experienced or thoughts that you have, that get stuck in your neuro networks. And we work to help you reprocess those and get those things unstuck. And then also, help you strengthen and increase your positive belief neuro networks. And then, there's also traditionally cognitive behavioral therapy, which is very common. And most therapists will say that that's their modality of comfort, or that that's the way that they view helping change clients perspectives. And so, with cognitive behavioral, it's definitely one where they really look at what are you thinking? So cognitive cognitions, what are your thoughts? Are they distorted thoughts, which means that they keep you stuck. Again, kind of like EMDR. And then you learn to challenge and replace them with thoughts that are positive or helpful, as I like to call them. And so, I also use CBT, as well. And then there's DBT, which I think is dialect ... I can never say that word. There we go. And so, that really starts talking about emotional responses, and emotional regulation, and things like that, to help people function in life and live successfully. Those are the common ones that I see. Psychoanalytic, as well, which I haven't seen too many people advertise as being psychoanalytic therapists anymore, but that's traditional Freud, if you know anything about psychology.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah, yeah. There's tons of different modalities and theories out there, which I'd say from a client's perspective, it can get pretty overwhelming. And so, through lots of research and lots of things throughout the years of psychology, they've pretty much proven that the relationship is the biggest part of the client/therapist work that people see progress out of. And so, if your a client, and you're getting super overwhelmed by all these letters and all these credentials and all these things, that's okay. You don't really have to focus in on that too much. That's part of the therapist's job. But to even get to this space as a client, how do people even find a therapist if they know counseling is something they want to integrate into their life or try?

Brittany Johnson:
Definitely. I always tell people a Google search is your first go-to. It's your favorite, or the easiest. And so, you can type "licensed therapists near me" in your Google search bar and it will come up a list of therapists that are in your area or people who have identified themselves as therapists in your area. Psychology Today is still one of the biggest search engines or search bars for a licensed therapist. There are psychologists on there that are licensed clinical social workers. There's LPCC, there's LMHCs. We are all on Psychology Today. And then, if you are looking for something more specific, there is a site for people of color. It's called Therapy for Black Girls. It's a directory of all clinicians of color or female clinicians of color for people to search. And then there is one noun, and you'd have to search therapy for LGBTQ, but there's actually a website that is just dedicated for therapy for people who identify as LGBTQ. And so, any clinician that's on that directory has already been vetted and markets themselves as being friendly to that community, educated on that community, and ready to serve that community. So, those are the top three sites that I've typically sent people to when they're looking for therapy.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah, those are all really good ones. One, and I can't remember the name of that one either for the LBGTQ community, but it is really great. And they have tons of physicians and other providers on there, too. I can't think of the name. Another one that I typically mention as well, and we'll kind of get into this in a little bit, is for individuals who struggle financially to pay for counseling. There's the Open Path Collective that is really good. How it works as a client is, you pay a lifetime membership fee to be an Open Path client and then you have access to a full network of therapists nationwide. And so, of course, if you live in Mobile, you're not going to see a therapist in San Francisco. But if you ever happened to move to San Francisco, you would be able to have access to this Open Path therapist, as well. And as an Open Path client, you're able to receive therapy for affordable prices. So, that can be really helpful for people who do have financial hardships, because therapy, of course, is a financial commitment on clients and as well as a personal and time commitment, too. And so, segwaying into that, how do people pay for therapy? Or what are all the options, I suppose.

Brittany Johnson:
Right. Luckily, we have the act that was passed by President Bush that made mental health be equal to physical health with your insurance, with your employer, and on insurance companies. So if you have a full time job or part time job that has medical benefits, you very likely also have mental health benefits. So that is kind of your first go-to is to check your insurance provider and see does your plan cover mental and behavioral health? So that's one way that you can go and if that is the case, each of those insurance companies have a directory of therapists, as well. And then Psychology Today, and then, typical websites, a lot of therapists list what insurances they accept on there, too. So, that's one way that you can do it. There is a private pay. You find a therapist. So let's say you decided to call Shannon because you saw her website and everything she had on there just really spoke to you, so you call her and you say, "Hey, I don't have insurance. I'd like to come." That means you are taking on the full financial responsibility to pay whatever fee Shannon has developed or determined for seeing clients. I have a lot of clients that do like to come and do private pay, and it is an investment in your health. But the way we talk about it is, you make investments on all types of things. If you like to go to Starbucks, that's an investment in your Starbucks' taste, right? If you like to buy shoes, that's an investment in your shoe collection. And so, mental health is the same way, if you were going to a spa. Then there's also, as Shannon mentioned, Open Path. There are some people who do, and I don't think we mentioned this yet, but there are some new ways and means to get therapy through online or tele-health. So there are places like Talkspace and BetterHelp. So for Talkspace, I know I've done a little bit of research on them. You pay a fee every month and then you get access to a therapist via your phone and your computer. So you never physically go to an office, you just do texts and video chats that way. So, that's kind of ways people pay. Going back to your employer, if you have an HSA or an FSA card, so a flexible spending account, you can use those to pay for therapy, as well. And many therapists take all sorts of means and methods of payment.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah, definitely. What if you're on on a therapist's site and they say I'm an out-of-network provider or an in-network provider. What do those terminologies mean?

Brittany Johnson:
Definitely. So, in-network provider means that that therapist has signed a contract with your insurance company, and they have agreed to only charge a certain amount of money per session. And then you would pay your copay or coinsurance, meaning whatever you split with your insurance company on medical bills, is the same way for mental health. So that's the in-network. So that means that you'll go see that therapist, they will collect your copay and then they will submit a claim to the insurance company on your behalf. And all you have to do is come in, be seen, and pay your copay. For out-of-network, there are some therapists who do submit those claims, as well. But I'll get into that in a second. But out-of-network means I do not have a contract with your insurance company, so I can charge you my full fee, which ranges in this area from anywhere from $60 to $250. So depending on the therapist and their experience, they set their fees. An out-of-network therapist is going to charge you their fee. So let's say our fee, Shannon and I have agreed that we both are going to charge people $100 per session. As the out-of-network therapist, I will collect the $150 from you. And then I will give you a piece of paper for you to submit to your insurance. Or again, like I mentioned a little while ago, there are some therapists who go ahead and submit those claims for you on your behalf. I, in my practice, I do not do that. I leave that up to the client. If they want to see me as an out-of-network, I will give them, it's called a super bill, but it's a piece of paper that says you paid me this amount of money so that you can submit to your insurance company and get reimbursement.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah. Yeah. And the super bills are really great. I have a lot of clients that use them and some people are getting reimbursed close to 80% of my fee. And so, it can be really helpful. And even if you're getting reimbursed about 10%, that's 10% you're getting back for taking that time to spend to better yourself. So, that can be really helpful.

Brittany Johnson:
Definitely.

Shannon Gonter:
And then, what about if people see private pay and sliding scale on someone's website? What does sliding scale mean?

Brittany Johnson:
Sliding scale means the therapist has decided that they're going to offer a lower rate for clients who have certain financial needs. And so, for sliding scale, most therapists if they offer that, they will ask you about your income. So, they are going to ask you questions about how much you make. And then they will determine how much of their fee they're going to waive to see you. When I first became a therapist in private practice, I did sliding scale only. I had some people who were only paying me $30 a session and then other people paying me $85 a session. I really found joy in being able to do that, being able to help therapists who other ... I'm sorry, clients who otherwise wouldn't have been able to seek therapy. But it is a courtesy from your clinician to do that.

Shannon Gonter:
Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Very much so. Okay. So as a client, done all of that, started therapy, found a therapist that we researched a lot, and we're kind of excited to go see. And then we're four sessions in and that excitement is dying off, or we're not really feeling that comfortable with this individual. What are our options? Or what do we do?

Brittany Johnson:
So options, you are in total control of how that that goes. So, you can stop going completely and never say anything to the therapist. Please don't do that. You can let the therapist know like, "Hey, I was really excited in the beginning but now I'm not really feeling like things are changing or things are progressing." Or you can start looking for another therapist and just start going to someone else. So even before you get to that point, and you kind of mentioned you've researched the website, you have decided on a person, most therapists offer a free 15 to 30-minute consultation. What that means is, the therapist has decided, I want to make sure that we are a good fit for each other, so I'm going to give you a free phone call. Or some of them actually do face-to-face. I'm going to give you a free ... I'm going to give you some of my time for free so that you can ask me questions and we can talk on the phone or talk face-to-face, to make sure we are actually a fit for each other. I think it's very important that anybody looking for therapy, that you use at consultation, because sometimes we have things written on our websites that sound great. And then when you go meet the person in face-to-face, none of that is matching, for whatever reason. Or they may have a belief about how to help you that you don't believe in. So I remember one time, I'll tell this quick story, I had a client. They saw my website, really wanted to come. They came in, and I didn't have a picture on my website. And so, this person made the comment, "You look way too young to be able to help me." We did the session because they came, and the entire session I could tell that it just was not going to work. So at the end of the session I was like, "You know what? I don't think this is going to work because it seems very important for you to have someone who looks older. So let me help you find someone that looks older." And so, what I know in hindsight is, I wish we would've had a conversation on the phone because we probably could have avoided all of that and it wasn't a waste of my time, but they really felt like they wasted an hour of their time coming to the appointment. So use the consultation, ask the questions that are important to you in terms of changing in your life and reaching your goals, and then go make the appointment.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Really good point. Yeah, that is something that one is always awkward, too, of like oh, let's get on a phone with a stranger and tell them why we want to go to counseling. But that is a total normal process of finding a therapist or a counselor. And also, the true meaning of there is no stupid question. Take that time to question the therapist. And in a sense, again, you are in the power seat here. Interview them, in a sense, personality wise or are different things like that that you think are going to show up in the room and maybe are going to be a conflict for you. And typically, people who have been in counseling before, sometimes the process looks a little bit different for them. So if you are, first time seeking a therapist and on that consultation call, it's totally normal for that therapist to ask you a couple times, do you have any questions for me? Because you're supposed to be able to use this time to mutually decide on each other.

Brittany Johnson:
Yes, yes. And if this is your first time or even if it's not your first time, but you've had some really rough times with therapists, think about therapy in a sense of you are going to have some of the most intimate conversations you'll probably ever have in your life. Not intimate sexually, because that's inappropriate and shouldn't be happening, but intimate in terms of this person is going to dig into you and dig into your life in a way to help you, but they need to know how you work, how you function, how you think. So they're going to be asking some pretty intimate, detailed questions. So when you're on the phone with this person, do you get the sense that you can handle it, and they can handle it, so to speak. Because there are some things that we just, you know, as therapists we know we're not comfortable with, and as clients, we know we wouldn't be comfortable saying certain things to certain therapists.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah, definitely. And then, I know a lot of therapists do this, and I personally do it in my practice, of the first three or so sessions I have with a client, I'm always reminding them, hey, it's totally normal. If after the third session or first session or 40th session you're not feeling it, that's okay. I know tons of other therapists in and around Louisville that I would be happy to refer you to. Because again, as a therapist, our goal is to make you the most comfortable and the most safe in the room. So if, for whatever reason, we're not going to take it personal, if you want a referral to another therapist, that's our role is to provide you with that safety. And so, it's very common within the therapist community to refer to other therapists. Just part of our career.

Brittany Johnson:
Definitely, definitely. And it's okay. And you know, I tell clients kind of in that sense, the very first session we're kind of going over the rules of our relationship and things like that. One of the things that I say to every client that comes in is, if you don't do anything else in this process, I need you to tell me if I'm not working for you. Because there's no sense in you continuing to schedule an appointment, drive over here, come sit in here, take time out of your life, if it's not working. That's the only rule I make in terms of what I require.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah, totally. To kind of wrap it up in a sense. What do you feel like is something that'd be really helpful for someone toying with these decisions now? Maybe they've had friends or family that have been in counseling before, it's been on their radar, but really in the background, for so long. But now, they're kind of feeling like, okay, maybe I need to make a decision about this counseling thing. What's something that you feel like could be really helpful for them to hear?

Brittany Johnson:
You deserve. That's kind of my go-to. As a person who was born as a human, you deserve peace, you deserve love, you deserve happiness. I know those typically sound cliche, but you deserve everything that you want out of life. And so, if there is something that's holding you back, whether it be something from your past, whether it be a current fear, or current situation, you deserve to have that cleared up so that you can live the life that you dream about, the life that you want. And I don't mean that in sense of you're going to wake up after going to therapy and have $1 million and live on the beach for life. That's not what I mean. I just mean that you deserve to have freedom to go after something like that, because if that's your goal, then let's see what we can do to get you there.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah, definitely. Oh, I love that. Yeah, you deserve. It's so simple and sweet but so helpful. Brittany thanks for hanging out with me today. I really appreciate you taking the time, of course, out of your busy day, but also, just to clear up some of those unknowns that a lot of people have about the therapy process.

Brittany Johnson:
Definitely. Thanks for having me. This was fun. We have to do this again.

Shannon Gonter:
Yeah. Oh, definitely. Okay. Talk soon.

Brittany Johnson:
Bye everybody.

Shannon Gonter, LPCC

Shannon Gonter 9/17/19 Shannon Gonter 9/17/19

How Long Should Someone Be In Counseling For?

There is no set time frame, it looks different for each person. Therapy is a unique and flexible process that can be adapted to fit the needs of each and every client.

Specific to my practice and session length, the initial intake session will be 90 minutes long, and every session after that will be 50 minutes from start to finish. Every counselor has the autonomy to structure their sessions a bit different but typically the average therapy sessions is 50 minutes long.

In regard to the therapeutic process, it varies from person to person. Some presenting concerns can be dealt with in a brief period of time, but this is not always the case. Unfortunately, there is no magic formula to determine how long counseling will take and for most it may take several months or years.

One hour a week for 6 months is approximately 24 hrs of therapy totally just one day of your life….

During the therapeutic process, you and I will frequently check in on your progress towards goals and will be continually evaluating your need for counseling.

My goal is to ultimately help you reach a point where you don’t need counseling anymore. You may still have personal work to do, but you will have learned the skills you need to act as your own therapist over time.

Shannon Gonter 2/25/19 Shannon Gonter 2/25/19

5 Counseling Myths

No matter what the topic is, there seems to be myths out there about it. Whether it’s that gum takes 7 years to digest once swallowed, or that cracking your knuckles causes arthritis. Not sure why myths are created, or what roots these counseling myths were originated in, but my thought is that they were created by people who were afraid to take the leap into personal growth, and/or who had a negative experience in counseling.

No matter what the topic is, there seems to be myths out there about it. Whether it’s that gum takes 7 years to digest once swallowed, or that cracking your knuckles causes arthritis. Not exactly sure why myths are created, but I do have some thoughts about the counseling myths i’ve heard over the years. Not sure what roots these counseling myths were originated in, but my thoughts are that they were created by people who were afraid to take the step into personal growth, and/or who had a negative experience in counseling.

Below are 5 myths debunked by me (the original myth buster).

1. COUNSELING MAKES PEOPLE TOO FOCUSED ON THEMSELVES

It’s true that counseling involves reflecting on your thoughts, feelings, choices, and relationships and increasing your self-awareness. But the point of all that increased awareness is to allow you to make more informed choices about what’s important to you, how you get your needs met in the world, and how you impact other people. While it does take a certain amount of self-reflection, it often results in you being more attuned to and present with other people in your life.

Taking care of yourself actually frees you up to be a better friend, partner, parent, and colleague.

2. COUNSELING WILL COST ME A FORTUNE

If you aren’t being reimbursed by your insurance company, counseling services can add up. But it is worth it! You are investing in your future. Before you say “it’s too pricey,” think about the cost of NOT doing therapy. Possible decline in job performance? Continued stress in relationships? Feelings of dissatisfaction with yourself and your life?

3. A COUNSELOR WILL FIX MY PROBLEMS RIGHT AWAY

The goal of counseling is not for someone else to “fix” your problems. Counselors are here to help you to identify those concerns and to set new goals for yourself. In therapy you will solve problems by working with with your counselor to explore your feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. In doing so, you can explore all your options and make a decision as to how to best achieve your goals. In the end, YOU know yourself the best, therefore YOU are the best one to “fix” your problems!

4. ASKING FOR HELP IS A SIGN OF WEAKNESS

Contrary to this belief, it takes a great deal of emotional strength to seek help for problems that may be too overwhelming to manage by yourself.

5. A COUNSELOR CAN’T UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM GOING THROUGH, BECAUSE THEY’RE NOT GOING THROUGH IT THEMSELVES

Each individual is unique, and no other human being sees the world exactly as you do. To achieve a complete understanding of your specific situation would be impossible. However, counselors have years of extensive training that allows them to learn about, be sensitive to, and respect each and every one of your unique experiences.

Shannon Gonter, Professional Counselor in Louisville, KY

Written by: Shannon Gonter, LPCC, NCC

Shannon Gonter 1/14/19 Shannon Gonter 1/14/19

7 Things Counseling Should and Shouldn't Be

coun·sel·ing

/ˈkouns(ə)liNG/

noun

1. the provision of assistance and guidance in resolving personal, social, or psychological problems and difficulties, especially by a professional.

We’ve all seen the word, or variations of the word within the mental health scene. We know someone who has been in counseling or maybe we’ve had first-hand experience with it. But I don’t think a lot of people know what should and shouldn’t happen within the counseling hour, and honestly, I don’t think that’s their fault. The nature of mental health client/counselor confidentiality and societies viewpoints on this field plays a big role in this “unknown world of the counseling hour”. But I am here to share 7 tips of what you “should” and “shouldn’t” expect when entering therapy with a new counselor.

1. You SHOULDN’T expect it to be like your typical medical physicians’ checkup.

It’s easy to associate mental health with your body and how to take care of your mental health with how you take care of your body. But it’s not quite the same. I mean there are some similarities; you make an appointment, drive to that appointment, enter the waiting room, fill out some paperwork, browse through a magazine and then someone calls your name (probably mispronouncing it) but that is where the similarities stop. 1) hopefully the physical décor within the office is slightly less sterile than your physician’s office and 2) that your counselor doesn’t say “okay everything looks good see you back next year” at the end of your appointment. Most people don’t go to their medical physician more than 5 times a year, but most people are seeing their therapist more than 20 times a year. If you enter counseling you are going to be expected to attend weekly, or bi weekly sessions for an estimated 3 months to a year or more.

2. You SHOULD be motivated and invested in your treatment.

One of the most important things you should expect is to be motivated and invested in your counseling process. There is a common myth out there that entering counseling makes one “too focused on themselves”. And it’s true, counseling does involve reflecting on your thoughts, feelings, choices, and relationships and increasing your self-awareness. But the point of all that increased awareness is to allow you to make more informed choices about what’s important to you, how you get your needs met in the world, and how you impact other people. While it does take a certain amount of self-reflection, it often results in you being more attuned to and present with other people in your life. Taking care of yourself actually frees you up to be a better friend, partner, parent, and colleague.

3. You SHOULD like and trust your counselor.

Sounds like a big ole “DUH”. But you will not believe the number of people I have met with that have described their past counselor as “totally opposite than me” or someone who “didn’t get me” or “had totally opposing beliefs as me”. Suggestion to the masses, do your research prior to entering counseling! If you are someone who often cusses and is abrasive, you might not want to pick the counselor who is highly professional and uses sophisticated language throughout their site. Pick someone who is more in line with your personality and wants for your future.

And even if you do your research beforehand and figure out you aren’t vibing after a few sessions, that’s okay! Let your counselor know this, and who knows there might be something that can be done to make you feel more comfortable or maybe there isn’t. But the good thing to note is that there are thousands of human helpers in your city and your counselor would be happy to provide you with a referral to a better fitting therapist.

4. You SHOULDN’T expect it to be easy.

Unfortunately, there is no “magic pill” and counselors don’t have wands that we wave around to solve your problems (because trust me, if I did, I would be waving it around like crazy and happily be out of a job). Counselors won’t tell you to go home and “rest, ice, compress and elevate” to heal your broken heart after a break up, or to assist in the grieving process after a loss of a loved one. They will tell you to keep coming back and that the counseling process will assist you in feeling more connected, more capable of dealing with the challenges of adulthood, and more empowered to make decisions and follow through on plans that reflect your renewed sense of self and purpose.

5. You SHOULD experience some feelings of discomfort.

As is the case with most things in life, there are both benefits and risks while participating in counseling. Counseling may improve your ability to relate with others, provide a clearer understanding of yourself, your values, and your goals, and it often helps relieve stress immediately. Along with these benefits, counseling will also involve discussing the unpleasant parts of your life, and you may experience uncomfortable feelings during these moments. But remember that using the awareness of one’s pain can aid the healing process and result in better relationships with yourself and others.

6. You SHOULDN’T expect your counselor to fix your problems.

The goal of counseling is not for someone else to “fix” your problems. Counselors are here to help you to identify those concerns and to set new goals for yourself. In therapy you will solve problems by working collaboratively with your counselor to explore your feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. In doing so, you can explore all your options and make a decision as to how to best achieve your goals. In the end, YOU know yourself the best, therefore YOU are the best one to “fix” your problems!

7. You SHOULD experience personal growth.

A lot of people enter counseling with the goals to “feel less” of something or “more of” something else, but the overall goal for everyone’s treatment should be personal growth. At the end of the day all we have control of is our own thoughts and actions. Therefore, more time needs to be spent on developing a sturdy ground for our internal and external selves to stand on. So, when shit does hit the fan and we are needing to “feel less of” this or “more of that” we are able to sort through our tool box and get our needs met with the assistance of a counselor, and eventually alone.

Written by: Shannon Gonter, LPCC, NCC